Yeah... Im going to be that guy that tries to do a live play-by-play on the newest sensation to hit the Chinatown bus phenonmenon: BoltBus.
1:05 - Arrive at 33rd and 7th Ave BoltBus stop in NYC. I see a bus. I decide to get a snack since I still don't need to in line till 1:15 (as stated on ticket). It's raining.
1:09 - Walk out of McDonalds caddy-corner to the stop. The Bus is gone. I repeat, the bus is gone. And now my fries are getting wet.
1:09:01 - I start to very slowly freak out. And I eat my fries.
1:16 - Officially, I should be waiting to hear my assigned number called out. But there is still no bus. There is ONE OTHER person waiting. Freak out in full effect. I have missed my bus.
1:28 - More folks with backpacks milling about. We all squeeze under an awning. It's raining harder. I will not recover from this.
1:29 - Other folks with bags officially looking for BoltBus. Freak out levels decreasing. Apparently the bus runs on the half hour after 12 PM.
1:48 - Bus Arrives! God bless you Boltbus!
1:53 - Now seated on Boltbus. Leather seats. Nice. Looking for outlets to plug in... NICE. Right in front of you on the seat back.
1:55 - Computer connects to the Boltbus network. SWEET. It's fast. Other bonus: bus not full, so nobody's sitting next to me. AWESOMETOWN. Freak out subsides completely.
1:56 - IM coworker. Brag. Make stupid network jokes about setting up a server from the bus. NERD ALERT. Whatever, I am still totally geeking out about the network.
1:58 - Bus starts moving. Log in to webmail. Starting to do work. IM with other coworker about real work. Now working. STILL FAST.
2:10 - Bus getting near Lincoln tunnel. Does the network hold?
2:17 - BLOGGING AND IMing from inside the Lincoln tunnel. Eat it Vamoose.
2:34 - Passing EWR, network slowing down. Starting to get car sick. Should not have supersized.
2:36 – Internet down, switching transcript to a word doc in the mean time.
2:51 – Damnit. Having trouble loading pages on the interweb. Still no problems with the IM though. The bus is SUPER quiet. No one seems to be working aside from me. Work-work is grinding to a halt, good thing instinct took over when I first got on the bus and knocked out most of it.
2:53 – Notice there’s a little extra room in the legs here. Always a good sign. Bus driver makes funny announcement, “Everyone on the bus is going to DC right?” It’s lulz-worthy, because he isn’t stopping for nobody and we know it.
2:55 – Gmail and Webmail timeout on me. IM still functional. We will not be setting up a server here today.
2:58 – Hitting New Brunswick. Even the IM is timing out now. Good thing the seats are comfortable.
3:01 – Weird, the faster we seem to go, the worse the connectivity. That doesn’t mean I want to be in traffic, but it does mean that I have something to be excited about SHOULD we get stuck in traffic.
3:06 – Posting notes from MSword, nearing the merging of lanes on the NJ Turnpike
3:08 – Notice lady in front of me trying to connect to the internet/look important like me. She has a pink screen desktop and has customized the font for all applications. She is adjusting her internet connections setting using McAffee for Windows. She has an AOL account from the same year as the Meg Ryan movie “You’ve Got Mail”. Best BoltBus lulz yet.
No, no wait… she’s now checking for viruses. Definitely wants to look important. Personalized font now identified as Comic-Sans.
BEST. LULZ. YET.
3:14 – Still trying to update post. Find myself saying, “Get there, get there, get there…” Realize irony of phrase since I’m BLOGGING ON A BUS.
3:15 – Romance of internet on a bus gives way to reality that I am, in fact, on a bus.
3:16 - Posting Accomplished!
3:23 – At exit 7A on the turnpike. IF you know me, this is where I start complaining about how I hate to drive on the turnpike.
Webmail up and running.
Comic-Sans lady now moving all icons on desktop from left side to right side.
3:39 – People from work are sending me meeting makers for 5:30 on a Friday. This is not unusual. I know realize I haven’t left work on a Friday earlier than 6:30 PM since 2006. Including the week of Christmas.
3:40 – Comic Sans Lady now looking at the TMZ.com. We’re nearing exit 2.
4:00 – Conference call on a bus with work. VPN access DENIED. Approaching toll plaza. The work keeps coming in, but I can’t seem to connect to get it back out.
4:11 – Delaware Memorial Bridge in 10 miles. Did I hate how long the turnpike is yet? Just got another meeting request, this time by from my cat, “to bite me.” Oh Jerseyfresh, you are too funny sometimes!
4:15 - Entire bus napping. Realize that I've been hunched over the comp for 2 hours straight. Taking a break. Wife is helping with network stress-testing by sending me links of shoes she wants of Piperlime.
5:40 - Baltimore... finally, back online. Part of it being that my Macbook Pro crashed at the DelMem Bridge, the other being that once rebooted, the internet was NOT WORKING.
5:54 - Yep, still working, just went through the 895 Tunnel with more connectivity than the entire state of Delaware.